Day 15 - A song that describes you.
Billy Joel - Always A Woman
“I am a wise young woman who likes to laugh…” I was fifteen at the time of writing that line in a writing exercise in sophomore English. The classic “I am” poem – fill in the blanks. My teacher said that it was brilliant, a fine example of irony. I don’t know about that, but it’s stuck with me all these years.
Today, I’d like to introduce you to me. In writing about my views, my perceptions, my opinions, and the events in my life, it’s time now to present a more dimensional picture. Often perceived in a certain way, few ever look to see the whole package, and really there is so much more to this book than it’s rigid binding.
“Never judge a book by its cover.” So it is said, but the fact is that we do judge on the spot. There are no saints among us. Tell me you’ve never done it, and I’ll spit in your eye. Yes, I’m guilty of the deed as well, though when the opportunity was taken to dig, it was well worth the effort.
Someone posed a question to me recently: “Do you believe yourself to be extraordinary, or are you ordinary?” Thinking about it, the only answer that came was.. “I am alternative.” Posing the question to others, some of the responses were quite interesting, and at the end of this reading, I invite you to ask yourself the same.
But, back to me, it is what we were discussing, no? Perhaps it’s being another year older than I was yesterday, though I could swear it’s been ten since last August. I am a lover, a fighter, and a friend. Having loved some of the most amazing people, I’ve come through some hard battles to wear my scars proudly – not all metaphorical. Look around me to see friendships that can tell a thousand stories. The family photos that you see are much deeper than the glossy, shallow smiles.
Interesting facts about myself: shockingly, I’m not nearly as witty, charming and stunningly beautiful as I appear on paper. It’s out of the closet that I am a “Fanilow” (oh, the longing to be Lola at Barry Manilow’s Copacabana, with yellow feathers in my hair!). I have broken my little toes four times on each foot, the most recent being just three weeks ago. Ouch. Classical music and good conversation turn me on. My online social life is legendary. A collector of things, a hoarder of memories. A pop culture junky, a former disc jockey and current videographer, and an artist.
I’ve been writing stories since the age of seven. Three years ago an unfortunate incident with an ATV left me wondering about ever walking normally again. My movie heroes are Norman Bates, Jaws, Lorelei Lee and King Kong – ask me why sometime. Annoying my kitties is a favorite pastime, because watching them spin in circles chasing a string tied to their tail makes me laugh hysterically.
I’m funny, believe it or not. This is inherited from my mother – she was a champion prankster, and “Mischievous” was her middle name. To know me in most situations is not to see my humor, but yes, I can be funnier than a squirrel that’s taken one too many nuts to the head.
Working for a comedy club brought me into marketing and promotions. There was a knack for that, even thought about trying the stage myself - knowing I can write a good joke because one of the comedians stole a few and performed them without permission, but they got laughs. I even went so far as to look into it again a few years ago, but there’s just one tiny problem that prevents me: stage fright. Ah, what could have been.
My love affair with music. I’ve been a groupie of disc jockeys as long as I can remember, and have met some great ones, including the Wolfman himself. Now that was a day to remember. Music drew me into this world as I grew older, and off to school I went. Ran our little student station for three years, and had a rather popular on-air show as well. For a non-profit station, we had higher ratings in our genre than most Bay Area commercial stations – I spoke to half a million people from that microphone on any given day, and I miss that connection still.
There have been a lot of jobs, having worn the hats of several industries. Retail, restaurants, a nanny (kids were great, the parents not so much), in marketing, in broadcasting. Trained to run a bar – but was too young upon graduation, therefore no job for me. I’m going to own a bar someday, though, a quiet little neighborhood pub. I now do video work for the local racetrack as a side gig. My husband and I own an industrial business. Never lasting very long at any one job, often working two to three at a time, I’ve always soared at the jobs that are not paid for – perhaps knowing I won’t be fired is what frees me.
I’m a Leo, and every bit of it. Stubborn, controlling, argumentative, and opinionated. Complex, moody, frustrating, loyal and fierce. Forgiving when I want to be, and known to carry a grudge for longer than I can remember why. Temperamental, but I know the value of an apology. Rushing headlong into life is my way, though have learned to take the lessons that can be to my advantage. I am a fool – one that’s lost her way. Haunted, wickedly so; this is what brings me just short of being pretty on the inside.
I am a redhead, and it happened like this: Born a blonde - my eighteenth summer was spent working with a guy that had the rudest attitude you ever did see. Oh, we fought so bad, we were fired by the owner’s daughter of this little restaurant every day that we worked together, and yet we just kept showing back up, scheduled or not. One day we were going at it and he shouted at me “you know, you really oughta color that hair of yours red so that people will know what a flaming bitch you are as soon as you walk in the door!”
The very next day… and ever since… true story, I swear. And that story’s gotten me many a free drink at the dive where I learned to shoot pool and perfect my flirting skills. As you can see, there’s a bit of a storyteller in this old girl.
I am a singer. Literally tone-deaf – but in the car I will sing like I am Janis Joplin on her last performance while the iPod blares in the background. Balls to the wall and full of soul. However, no Idol dreams for me.
Then came the party girl – I’d tell you those stories, if I could remember them. A good chunk of my twenties disappeared into those deep bottles. I’m pretty sure I had a great time doing so, either that or managed to block out some necessary evil. But the one where I was caught.. well, that’s a story best kept to myself for now.
I am spoiled by my husband, and am loved. In the tradition of my grandfather, he is one of the greatest men to walk this earth. Sure, he has faults, but his greatest gift is
that he puts up with me. With all of my quirks, my bumps and lumps and issues, of which there are more than a TV Guide subscription.
Above all of this, I am a writer. Thank you for taking this time to get to know me. I do hope we’ll chat again soon. I’ll be leaving some new words at your doorstep shortly.